Another (Really Sweaty, Often Butter Laden) 30

I am just sitting down to blog (and take a cleansing breath) after what has been an insanely active couple of weeks. I don't really like going this long between blogs because then I don't know where to begin or how to edit myself. I mentioned previously I am much better at detailing the minutiae than I am at summarizing our weekly activities. I think my best shot at keeping this from being a 50,000 word entry will be to bullet point and since it's been another 30 days, I am going with the previously used 30 in 30 format. So without further disclaimer, here are the things that I have learned, done and discovered in our third month as New Yorkers.

1. Brunch is big here. Especially fixed price brunches that include unlimited Bellini's, mimosa's, bloody's and screwdriver's. You know, all the drinks that make people feel like it's okay to booze it up before noon. A word to the wise: don't plan on having any other plans after meeting friends for brunch. And if at all possible, do brunch at like 2. The exception would be if you are the person whose first thought upon waking up is "How can I completely waste this gift that is today?".

2. I have moved on from a daily bagel to a near daily chocolate croissant (pain au chocolat) from Amy's Bread. OMG. They also have a cheese biscuit that is TDF. I don't know if that is an actual text acronym, but it stands for "to die for". If it's not, I am trademarking it.

3. I have become proficient at making use of every scrap in my fridge and pantry and wasting very little. It's drilled into our heads in class to waste nothing lest we want to put our future employers out of business for trimming too much off a carrot. I also have to give credit to our old roommates (& benefactors) Emmy & Curtis. They had a regular "Clean Out The Cabinet" night, as they called it. It's exactly what it sounds like and usually ended up being incredibly delicious, if not interesting.

4. I am regularly practicing my knife skills on unsuspecting carrots, turnips and potatoes at home. Classical French cuts generate massive amounts of waste in the form of trimmings. We currently have a stockpile of what I like to call Clean Out the Fridge Soup in our freezer. And I have a batch simmering now, although this one has Parmesan rinds and mushroom stems for variety. Although it sounds like garbage, it's actually quite delicious.

5. I can only fit so much more soup in the freezer. I have got to get more creative.

6. People weren't kidding when they told me the city is disgusting in the heat of the summer. I've been to humid places before, but there is usually an ocean or a pool nearby to help you deal with the oppressive wet heat. And you usually go from an air conditioned car to an air conditioned building, you don't walk every where always carrying a load of something. If you have never experienced a Manhattan summer, let me paint you a picture. Imagine walking out the door of your AC chilled apartment, freshly showered and dressed. By the time you are down one flight of stairs you have a sweat mustache and a halo of moisture beads. By the time you hit the street, sweat is running in streams down any part of your body that forms a natural canyon. It is pooling at the small of your back and soaking your undergarments. By the time you reach the lower platform of the subway you are pretty sure you know what it feels like to be inside someones mouth. A layer of frizzies form simultaneously with the disappearance of the efforts of your curling iron, all synchronized with carefully applied makeup sliding off your face. And then you feel it. The beginnings of a breeze. You throw your arms wide, close your eyes and relish the wind generated by the subway powering into the station, cooling the moisture on your skin. This moment is the sad equivalent to jumping in the pool at my old place in San Diego each night to cool down. I can't tell if a tear just rolled down my cheek or if it was sweat.

7. Two of our favorite people, Nate & Melissa spent a week here recently and we had a great time, see pictures below. We also learned a few things, see #'s 8 - 11.



Playing "7's" at Brooklyn Brewery



Checking out the Manhattan skyline from Brooklyn Heights

7. Positioning of the sofa bed just a few inches to the left can result in nearly being trapped in our bedroom and unable to reach the restroom in the middle of the night, save for a creative sideways shimmy. A few inches to the right, no problem.

8. Near trapping incident led me to imagine inventing giant suction cup shoes and walking on the walls to the bathroom. I concluded that I did not have the agility or coordination to make suction shoes work.

9. I am considering issuing a travel warning (like the ones by the US Department of State) to all of our upcoming visitors (and there are many) describing the conditions they can expect during their stay. It would include key phrases such as "lacks space and range of motion", "packing light is advised", "hospitable and welcoming hosts", "outdoor rat sightings likely", "home cooked meals probable". Nate & Melissa were stellar house guests and seemed appreciative to not pay $300 a night for a 150 square foot hotel room, rather than worry about the lack of amenities. I write this not to deter guests in any way, we LOVE hosting friends and love even more that they want to visit, I just want to make sure the expectation is set and no one feels like they got a bait and switch. 500 square feet people, 500.

10. We did so many great things with Nate & Melissa: we ate well (Telepan, Jean Georges, Chinatown dumplings), we drank well (Brooklyn Brewery, Rattle N' Hum, BrookVin, Clover Club) and we covered a lot of ground (from Central Park all the way to the World Trade Center and pretty much everything in between, with a few days in Brooklyn. Nate & Mike even took the train to Westchester for a brewery trip, shocking, I know). Basically, we had a wonderful time and it only made us miss them more.

11. There are a few things that we had to see when we moved here because they are New York icons that actually have little redeeming value other than checking them off your list. Now that we have seen them, I am going to start a list of places that I could never go back to and be thrilled about: 1. Times Square. 2. I can't think of anything else at this point, but will let you know when I do.

12. We just returned from LA/Santa Barbara for our pals Jen & Dustin's wedding. We got to see most of our LA friends and some of our San Diego friends (and a whole slew of people that I haven't seen in 15 years from my hometown). This trip was a double edged sword for me. But I have to interrupt myself and wonder how well a knight does in battle with a single edged sword. And wouldn't that just be called a knife? Anyway, visiting California and spending time with our friends made me miss it for the first time and them even more. It feels like home, but I love New York City. I have to either figure out how to make enough cash to be bi-coastal or convince a significant portion of my friends to move here.

13. J & D's wedding was spectacular. They had one of those no detail left unattended to kind of events that was beautiful, fun and touching all at once. The highlights for me were: the location (Santa Barbara Zoo with mountains as a backdrop and Pacific Ocean below, paper lanterns and lights strung over the tables and dance floor), seeing friends (especially wine tasting time with J-Mo, Jenn Mora to the non softballers), and the feeling that everything was so them (the music & dancing, the next day softball game, the long winded speeches that are characteristic of D and his side of the family). It was perfect!





San Diego Softballers: Burnsy, Funk, Mike, Dustin, Jen, Half of My Head, Scott, J-Mo

14. We also spent an evening with our LA friends and the best way I can describe it is like having the most amazing chocolate cake put in front of you and having a few bites and then having it taken away. I miss my Jill ferociously and seeing her was divine and saying goodbye was awful. I know it will be the same when I see Donna later this month. It's the same sort of feeling with many of my girlfriends that are scattered across the country. There is so something to be said for good girlfriends in your life and I will count myself blessed to have people who I miss and miss me. Sniffle.

15. Speaking of girlfriends and friendships in general, we are making friends here. I love my classmates - they are a seriously fun bunch and there are a few who I feel like I've known for a lot longer than 6 weeks. One of them is the New Jersey version of me (complete with Italian name and Jersey accent) and we might be trouble together.

16. I finish Level 1 of my program at the end of the week, complete with big test and practical exam. I will no longer be a newbie, but I still get to keep Chef Nic (and his constant reminders that he doesn't want to see any mooshy wegetables) for one more level.

17. Chef Nic loves butter, duck fat, cream and a sprig of thyme. I am thinking for my menu project later in the program that I will deep fry sprigs of thyme in duck fat and serve it with a cream and butter sauce. It will go over like gangbusters. And I will be carrying a defibrillator instead of handbag.

18. I am finding French technique to be invaluable in truly understanding food and preparing it.

19. I am finding French technique overly fussy (and fattening) and am developing a better sense of what kind of a cook I am.

20. I am a cook who likes fresh, clean flavors with simple, straightforward preparations.

21. I am convinced my arteries are getting smaller every day.

22. Rats on the subway tracks are cool to see, rats on the street are creepy.

23. Cockroaches anyplace = BLLECCCHHH

24. I always thought that I would take extreme heat over cold any day of the week. I am now questioning that sentiment. Time will tell.

25. Maintaining a pedicure in this city is no easy feet (pun intended, hardee har). Walk, sweat, grime, repeat.

26. If anyone can answer this for me, I will send you a prize (that will most likely be something doused in butter). Why would someone fashion a bike helmet out of plastic grocery bags instead of just wearing the real thing? I mean, it looks just as dumb but it serves no purpose. Especially when that someone is a rather large woman with balance issues likely induced by the flask of Jim Beam nestled in her cleavage. And said woman has a habit of falling in slow motion off her bike in Washington Square. I am not kidding, I picked up this woman's "helmet" after witnessing what must have been one of many spills that day, judging by her condition, and realized that it was actually a replica made from grocery bags. And a damn good one. If you have enough money to get drunk, you can afford a helmet. And you probably need one more than the sober bike riders out there. And if you are talented enough to make art out of garbage then you should do that instead of getting drunk in the afternoon. Unless you are at brunch, then it's perfectly acceptable.

27. Creepy people aren't as creepy when there are a hundred other people that look normal in your vicinity.

28. Making eye contact with a normal person and doing the head shake/half smile/shoulder shrug (as if to say "Who KNOWS what's up with that guy?!") when a creepy person does something creepy happens at least twice a day.

29. Creepy people = bonds with strangers.

30. I am considering eating leftover veal in cream sauce at 2am because I am still wired from class and now a little hungry. (Trying to picture my arteries closing). Hopefully that fends off another meal of fat cooked with a bit of meat and more fat. I'll return soon with a more digestible and coherent blog. But it will be covered in butter and heavy cream.